As the sun beat down on an Arizona rally, Kamala Harris and her trusty sidekick, Tim Walz, were ready to deliver their carefully rehearsed messages to a hand-picked crowd. But before rally-goers could bask in the glory of campaign promises and well-practiced laughter, there was just one little formality: government-issued ID, please.
Now, this might not seem unusual, but here’s where the real fun begins. Once inside, the star of the show, Kamala Harris, took the stage to deliver her rally cry against the horrors of…wait for it...voter ID requirements!
That’s right, folks. Apparently, asking for ID at the polls is the ultimate act of discrimination, but somehow asking for ID at her rally? Just good planning.
“Before you hear why voter ID is racist, I need to see your ID,” one security officer likely muttered while glancing at a list of “Approved Forms of Identification.” Of course, it’s all part of Harris’s grand strategy. After all, how can you truly understand the deep systemic racism of voter ID laws without experiencing the high-security thrill of handing over your driver’s license to hear about it?
In Kamala’s world, it all makes perfect sense. Asking for ID at the voting booth? Racist. Asking for ID at a Harris-Walz rally? Common sense. After all, they’re not just any politicians. They need to know who’s attending their events! Random strangers being allowed in could lead to gasp differing opinions. And heaven forbid, an unapproved American might sneak in!
"We're here to fight against discrimination,"
Kamala boomed from the podium, her voice echoing across the crowd. "We will not stand for laws that make it harder for people to vote just because they don’t have an ID."
A ripple of applause spread through the audience, all of whom had proudly displayed their IDs moments earlier. The irony was so thick, you could cut it with a government-issued knife. If the ID requirement for voting is a “system of oppression,” what does that make the ID requirement for a rally? A “system of seating arrangement”?
Meanwhile, Tim Walz stood proudly beside her, nodding vigorously, perhaps wondering whether his own staff had remembered to bring his ID (after all, he’s had a few memorable mix-ups). The duo pressed on, convincing the crowd that ID checks for voting disproportionately harm minorities—right after requiring everyone to flash their IDs to get in the door.
The rally highlight: Kamala’s dramatic declaration that no one should be asked for identification when exercising their right to vote. “We need to break free from this outdated system of voter suppression!” she shouted, completely unfazed by the small forest of IDs that had waved their way past security earlier. Apparently, in Kamala’s universe, the racism only starts when you’re trying to vote and not when you’re trying to hear her latest one-liner.
In the back, a perplexed attendee whispered to his friend, “So...showing ID here is fine, but showing ID to vote is racist? Should I take notes?”
Kamala wrapped up the rally by announcing that all future events would require even stricter ID checks because, as she put it, “we need to keep out the riff-raff, but in a way that’s, like, totally not racist.”
And there you have it, folks. Racism is, apparently, just a small price to pay for a well-organized rally. Don’t forget to bring your ID—Kamala’s going to need it before she tells you why you shouldn’t need it. Logic? Who needs it when you’ve got campaign slogans?
As the crowd filtered out, one thing was clear: irony isn’t just alive and well—it’s running the Harris-Walz campaign.
Click for news article: Harris campaign ID requirement at Arizona rally draws calls of hypocrisy
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