The circus rolled into town on April 15 with the Trial of Donald Trump, the event that everyone didn't know they wanted but couldn't look away from. The prosecution, dressed in their finest clown costumes, argued that Trump’s 2016 campaign benefitted from hush money payments to Stormy Daniels.
Of course, this was all orchestrated by Trump’s former lawyer, Michael Cohen, who would fit right in as the ringmaster of this legal three-ring circus. Cohen, reimbursed via what they claimed was a “false retainer agreement,” seemed about as reliable as a trapeze artist without a safety net.
After calling a cavalcade of 20 witnesses, the prosecution rested on May 20. The defense argued that Trump was blissfully unaware of any allegedly unlawful scheme. Cohen’s credibility as a witness was about as sturdy as a house of cards in a wind tunnel, and the retainer agreement was claimed to be as legitimate as any other document you sign without reading.
The crux of the prosecution’s argument wasn’t the payment itself. No, it was the intent to interfere with the election by suppressing the story. Legal scholars from all walks of life, from the esteemed professor at Harvard to the guy who wrote “Law for Dummies,” agreed that this case was a sham, more suited for a daytime soap opera than a courtroom.
Meanwhile, in the other ring, we have Joe Biden and his son Hunter. Now, Hunter is accused of the very relatable crime of illegally purchasing and possessing a gun while being higher than a kite on drugs. Despite openly discussing his crack cocaine addiction like it’s a favorite hobby, Hunter pleaded not guilty to three charges. In a twist no one saw coming, Hunter’s infamous laptop made its grand entrance as evidence.
This laptop, the Pandora’s box of our time, was discovered a mere 10 months before the 2020 election. Joe Biden, in an Oscar-worthy performance, assured the American public that the laptop was as fake as a three-dollar bill. Not only did he lie, but he also wielded the powers of the presidency like a toddler with a magic wand, suppressing the story and censoring media outlets faster than you can say "fake news."
Now, if we were to compare, Trump’s case hinges on the prosecution trying to read Trump’s mind, a feat even David Copperfield would shy away from. They need to prove his intent to interfere with the election, which is about as easy as finding a needle in a haystack. Biden’s case, on the other hand, is as clear as day. He obstructed justice, lied about the origins of the laptop, and whipped up a PR campaign claiming Russian interference, convincing even the most skeptical that this laptop was a piece of Cold War memorabilia.
Surveys suggest that had the laptop information been released, it would have swayed voters’ opinions. Conversely, even if the claims against Trump were true, current polling indicates it wouldn’t have changed a single vote. For further affirmation, just look at the current polling numbers before and after the trial. It seems the only constant in this chaotic courtroom carnival is that truth is stranger than fiction, and sometimes, it’s downright hilarious.
Footnote: Stay tuned for an upcoming detailed comparison of the Biden and Trump document differences. Spoiler: It’s going to be a wild ride.
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